Boundaries and Grief: Protecting My Heart in a World That Has Shifted

When grief entered my life yet again on 5/27/2025, everything shifted. This time it was DIFFERENT! It wasn’t just the loss of my daughter that shook me, it was the way my entire world changed. The dynamics of my relationships, the way I started to show up in spaces, and even how I see myself are no longer the same. I am not who I was before, and every day I am learning to live with a heart that feels both broken and vulnerable.

Living in My Shifted World

Grief strips life down to what’s real. People I thought would be here, AREN’T! Conversations feel different! Sometimes I don’t want to talk about my loss, and other times I ache for someone to say her name. The shift is not just in me, but also in how others handle me.

This is why I know BOUNDARIES aren’t optional for me, they are necessary.

Why I Need Boundaries in My Grief

Grief has left me tender and exposed. Things I once brushed off now cut deep. I can’t be everywhere, I can’t answer everything, and I can’t explain myself every time someone has opinions about how I should grieve.

So I set boundaries. I say NO when I need to. I step back when conversations feel too heavy. I limit access to people who drain me. Boundaries protect my healing. They give me space to honor my daughter’s memory and also honor my own heart.

Acknowledging My Triggers

My triggers show up without warning. A date on the calendar. A song I didn’t expect to hear. HEARING JP & TALIYAH call me mommy pierces through me because Mya’s not here to call me MOMMY! This is painful! I’m trying to figure out what’s really wrong with me! Even when someone tells me, “You’re so strong,” it stings, because some days I feel anything but strong.

I no longer hide from these triggers. I name them. I sit with them. I pray through them. And I give myself permission to step back when it’s too much. Boundaries allow me to say, This is more than I can carry right now, and that’s okay.

The Enemy is Trying to Attack My Vulnerability

In these raw moments, I know the enemy tries to attack me. The devil whispers lies, that I am alone, that I am weak, that my grief will drown me.

But I hold on to God’s truth: “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit” (Psalm 34:18). Even in my weakness, His strength holds me up. My boundaries aren’t just protecting me from people, they are protecting me from the lies of the enemy.

Choosing Grace in My Healing

Every day I give myself grace. Some days I can show up strong. Other days just getting through the day feels like a victory. Both are okay. I don’t have to perform for anyone. My grief is my own, and my healing doesn’t have to look like anyone else’s.

Protecting my peace doesn’t mean I’m pushing people away. It means I’m choosing the right spaces, the right voices, and the right energy for this SEASON in my LIFE. It means I’m letting God do His work in me while I carry both my pain and my daughter’s legacy.

Though the river of grief bends and twists, its calm waters remind me I am still being carried.

✨ From My Heart:

My world has shifted, but my boundaries keep me grounded. They allow me to protect my healing, guard my vulnerability, and silence the lies of the enemy. My grief is not the end of my story, it is part of my journey, and I walk it with love, grace, and God’s presence.