When Grief Speaks, but my Faith Still Shouts

When the Word Becomes a Lifeline

Today’s message from The Cool’s visiting pastor, Pastor Rudy Nikkerud, hit me in a place I didn’t even know needed healing. His sermon, “The Sound of Victory,” wasn’t just another Sunday word. It was a divine whisper straight to my soul where I clearly heard God say, “Jamara, this is for you.”

And it was.

Because it’s the exact season I’m walking through. A season of heaviness, of heartbreak, of trying to keep breathing when everything hurts.

The Year That Tried to Break Me

I’ve said it more than once. “2025 has been the worst year yet.” And I’ve felt that truth in my bones. But here’s what I’m starting to believe: there’s still time for 2025 to turn around.

God is not finished.

Even in this season of loss, there’s still a shout rising from within me.

When Grief Silences Everything But God

I’ll be honest, life knocked the SHOUT out of me. There were days I couldn’t breathe, let alone praise. My mind has been scattered by grief, twisted by memories, and weighed down by questions I cannot answer. Because Jahmya is gone. Gone in the flesh.

And that kind of pain?

It’s beyond words.

It steals your strength, your focus, your joy, even your ability to pray out loud.

But even when I couldn’t speak, something in my spirit refused to die.

Praise from the Ashes

Even in the chaos of my mind, even in the silence of my sorrow, my spirit still remembers how to praise. I still shout. Maybe not as loud. Maybe not as strong. But I still shout. Because God never left. Even in my brokenness. Yes, my heart is shattered. A piece of it left with Jahmya. But she’s not truly gone.

She lives in my heart,

in my laughter,

in my tears,

in the love that still beats inside me.

The Sound That Still Rises

And that same heart, bruised, crushed, and weary will be mended.

Not by time.

Not by empty words.

But by the healing power of Jesus.

In Your holy name, Lord, I find the strength to stand.

To praise.

To shout.

To believe.

So today I shout.

Not because life is easy.

Not because the pain is gone.

But because You are still worthy.

I shout because Jahmya’s life mattered. And I shout because this is not the end. I will see her again.

A Shout That Echoes in Heaven

Until then, I will praise You with every broken piece of me. Because even the broken can make a sound of victory. Even the crushed can worship. Even the grieving can still believe.

And maybe today, you needed to hear this too. Are you still holding your shout inside, hoping it will come back? What sound of victory is still rising from your broken place?

TAKE HEART! God hears even the quietest whisper of your soul. You don’t have to have it all together to be held by Him. Your broken praise is still praise. Your silent tears are still prayers. And your story, no matter how heavy, is still being written by a faithful God. So keep showing up. Keep breathing.

And that’s more than enough. ❤️‍🔥🦋